I was told there would be glowing!
Finding out we were finally pregnant was by far, to date, the best day of my life. The day our embryo was transferred to me via IVF, I knew I needed to believe I was pregnant, and that's exactly what I did. I made it my mission to protect that little pea in my pod with everything I had. I was put on bed rest for 3 days and then house arrest for an additional 2 days.
Five days without leaving the house. You could say, my mind was running fucking wild.
Immediately, I started searching for symptoms. Google, please tell me I'm pregnant! I read that cramping indicated implantation. Or, bleeding could also mean that. I didn't really seem to have either of those. I didn't feel nauseous. My boobs didn't hurt. I didn't "feel" pregnant.
I started to panic. I needed to feel something. ANYTHING.
Looking back, there may have been slight symptoms, but with all the IVF meds I was on, they could have been triggered by that. I had a hot flash or two. I had a small twinge feeling in my stomach on one particular day, that honestly could have just been gas. And I was HUNGRY AF.
But none of these screamed "pregnant".
I really didn't start seeing symptoms until I was much further along, about eight weeks or so. A lot of the things I was feeling, weren't at all what I "expected".
Here is a list of the unexpected symptoms in my first trimester around 8-13 weeks...
HEADACHES!!
I had the WORST headaches of my life. Mind numbing, can't function kind of headaches. I couldn't see straight, I couldn't lift my head, I couldn't function. And the worst part is, I couldn't really take anything. I relied on warm baths, peppermint essential oils on the back of my neck and temples, ice packs, and Tylenol (which didn't do jack shit). My doctor told me so start drinking caffeine, which seemed to help a little. But honestly, I just had to ride it out for a few weeks. I wish someone had told me this!
BLOODY NOSES
As all pregnant women know, any type of blood when you are pregnant is a 911 emergency! I was feeling extra congested and would have bloody noses pretty regularly. Or just hard, bloody boogers clogging my shit up! It wasn't fun!
NARCOLEPSY
People tell you that you will be tired during your first trimester, but this kind of tired, is vastly different than anything I've ever encountered. Your entire body feels like a thousand pounds and keeping your eyes open requires a strength that I often didn't have. I was taking naps every day, and any where. In my car, mostly!
BLOATING & WEIGHT GAIN
No one told me about the early bloat stage, and here I thought I was "showing" already at 4-6 weeks. If you've used any type of fertility meds, you are likely to be on serious swole! I was! I gained at least 15 pounds just from the fertility medications. Oh joy!
DRY SKIN
Pregnancy Glow, my ass!!! My skin was atrocious! I was on Amazon Prime ordering a new face scream every day to find something that would help my patchy, flakey face. The only thing that seemed to work for me was this BeeFriendly Face cream.
"ALL DAY" SICKNESS
Who the fuck ever came up "morning sickness" was a mother fucker! I was feeling sick all day, err day from about 8-12 weeks. The best way I can describe it, is like feeling car sick. I never vomited, I just felt shitty. I tried every type of ginger product I could, and the ginger candy's that actually get warm in your throat going down, were the only thing that really helped. These Gin Gin's were my saving grace!
MONTEZUMA'S REVENGE
Okay, I know that sounds dramatic, but it's the only way I can describe it. I had extreme diarrhea for weeks and weeks. And when I say "extreme" I mean, the run to the bathroom before you piss out your ass in your pants kind of diarrhea. I like to call it the "soda stream". Sorry, I'm not gonna sugar coat any of this. Apparently there are different types of "morning sickness" and this is the one that isn't talked about, for obvious reasons. My entire pregnancy I never vomited, well not out of my mouth anyway. Only out of my asshole. Was I glowing? If a greenish, pale skin color is your definition of glowing, then call me a mother fucking glow worm.
MEAT DISGUST
If you know me, you know I love some chicken wangs something fierce, but in my first trimester I couldn't even be in the same room with chicken, or any type of meat for that reason. I made my husband eat his meals in a different room because I couldn't stand to look at it. I was full on vegetarian from 8-13 weeks, and by vegetarian, I mean I ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, every damn day. That's all I could do.
Okay, so I know I'm making this all sound really terrible, but after all I've been through to get pregnant, I'd do it all over again, and again, and again. I found time to embrace my narcolepsy naps, because I'm a very "on the go" kinda person and rarely slow down. My siesta king of a husband, loved it!
I felt very peaceful and relaxed for once in my life.
I took a lot of baths, did a lot of reading (when I didn't have a headache) and did my best to live in the moment and embrace the human growing inside me. How could I expect it to be easy?
I'm growing bones! And brains, and organs, and limbs and shit. This process is supposed to be hard work!
It's fucking magic!
